Choice

My journey started with a failed relationship. I left her because there was something wrong with her. She wasn’t good enough.

People kept telling me there were plenty more fish in the sea. It was easy the first time, to leave. But each time a relationship failed, and I walked away, it got more difficult, I felt their pain more and more. The first time, I didn’t feel any pain, but the last time, it was so painful that I realized that I couldn’t hurt anyone else until I figured out what the problem was. I had to find out why this was happening. What was wrong with all of these women? Why did they keep failing me? It was another two years of celibacy before I realized that I was the common factor. It wasn’t me and them, each of these relationships involved two people, and I was one of them.

The second realization was that I had made a choice to enter each of these relationships. For each relationship there was a moment of no return.

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